Ain Syazwani

Mama!!!...I'm big now.... Ain Syazwani 2 yrs 8 months


baby Syazwani


waei' as cha call her was born on 20-4-2005. When the delivery date approached, i really hope that her birthday would fall on the same day as maulidurrasul.Yet she was so anxious and arrived one day earlier on 11 Rabi'ulawal.The delivery pain was so short.I woke up at 5 am because of the frequent contraction.Sebab dah nak masuk subuh, me and Deen perform our subuh prayer first b4 send the kids to nursery.At about 6.15 we headed to the hospital.At time the pain was so unbearable.It's hard for deen to drive with me keep on pulling his hand as i really cannot stand the pain.Sampai kat hospital terus masuk labour room.My doctor came in short and spaggetti strap top...:). The problem was dont have energy to push.May be age was the factor, i was 30 yrs 5 mnths at that time. Deen keep on saying that this should be the same as the 2 previous one but i really know it's different. I keep on saying "It's different...it's different" to the doctor. When the doctor try to touch my stomach i event shouted at her. "Doctor...dont you ever touch my tummy ..." ( haha... i dont know that i cant still shouted in English eventhough that time macam dah tak berapa sedar dah...).So i have to be induced.....When the doctor hold the baby to me...she said... you know why it's different? it's 3.8 kg.With the pelvic like yours, your'e lucky it's the third baby.It not sure kena caesarean "

The name,Syazwani was my husband's choice....Honestly, i'm not that fond of this name...macam tak pernah terfikir ada anak nama syazwani, but since Deen like it, it does'nt really matter to me...It should only be Dayang Nur Syazwani.But I persuade deen to slot Ain in between as i really like syafiqa's name to be dayang nur ain syafiqa, i just dont want deen to be down , by altering the name he really like.Jadi nama baby yang garang ini ialah dayang nur Ain Syazwani bt Datu Mohd Rithauddeen.



Syazwani with her babysitter , Mama Ani and her family on her 1st birthday.

Syazwani berjalan exactly on her 1st bday. A bit later than kakak (10 months) and earlier than cha(14 months)

syazwani and baba when she was 1 yr plus.


She had a very severe constipation problem...haha... that's explain why muka dia garang sangat masa ni. Dia makan banyak sangat tapi tak besar-besar.Masa dalam perut je besar lepas tu kecut kat luar.



Ain and mama at Planetarium negara... tengok muka dia yang ketakutan , takut kena makan dengan dinasour. Among my kids, cuma dia saja yang besar dengan babysitter. Yang lain dari kecik lagi berdikari kat nurseri, dan belajar speaking dari kecik lagi.Dia ni tak reti cakap english, maklumlah tak pegi sekolah....:) so bila kami semua speaking dia akan berkata dalam loghat penang yang kiut sangat.... "Haaaahhhhh...apadiaaaa....?" bila suruh dia nyanyi lagu dia akan menyanyi " lagu..lagu...lagu...laguuuuuuu". kiut giler...(ye la aku kan mak dia ...mesti rasa kiut nyer...padahal kalau hangpa tengok biasa je...). sekarang ni umur dia 2 tahun 7 bulan. Next year dah masuk 3 tahun, maybe kena hantar dia pegi sekolah kot


Eh...where's syazwani?...mama, alani, cha and 8 months syazwani in mama's belly.


Burried alive in Langkawi 2006

The early years

This picture was captured in late 1997 , during our early years...The event took place in Shangrila Rasa Sayang in Batu Feringgi.This was among one of the first formal (indeed very formal) event I attended. Not familiar with all jargons in millitary protocol i could not help myself from giggling everytime we have to stop eating ( and chewing ...:)) when the music stop. I ended up feel like not eating at all as before i could finish 'operate' the chicken and put it in my mouth the music had stop and the waiter came to collect the 'empty' plate.Plus teh stupid joke that Deen keep on doing throughout the dinner to make me laugh and could not eat almost at all. At the end after the event we headed up for Nasi kandar.I brought along Aida and Aidahani together as two of Deen's friend did not have any partner.It's like a series of unsuccessfull match making... haha...both of you...still single hah?!

A few days after graduation



location: infront of USM museum.Before we return the graduation robe we took a chance to snap a few photos together.We looked so happy eventhough a 'deadly' thing happened on Deen's graduation day...Deen sure remember it clearly. To Abang, I'm so sorry for all those stupidness, stubornness and whatever ness that i did to you during our early years.Thank you for loving me the way i was.Thanks for staying in control to handle all those turbulance, and thanks for keep on staying next to me no matter how many times i asked you to leave....:). you are one in a million and i'm so lucky to have you beside me... and one more thing...sorry jugak sebab Nor abang abang kena kutuk ngan kengkawan sebab ada awek kurang ajar... just because i refused to called your name instead of 'kau' and keep on addressing myself as 'Aku'. Still remember? hahahaha...to kawan-kawan Deen yang pernah mengutuk aku dulu, dah lepas kawin ni aku tak de la kurang ajar cam tu lagi...kena la hormat kan...dah jadi husband.



The handsome guy in purple is mine...:) Picture dated in 1997



Deen and his friend in KCP just a week after our relationship 'officially' started. I know that this picture was taken specially for me...betul tak abang? admit it hahaha...control macho la tu...

3 Puteri di hati mama

Masa ini baru je pindah kat umah ni.Syazwani kecik lagi masa ni... dalam 3 4 bulan baru pindah ni...lupa plak bila gambar ni di ambik tapi rasanya dalam bulan 3 atau 4 tahun 2006.

Kids ...always come with responsibility..diorang ni walaupun pompuan nakalnya ..memang boleh tahan. kalau setakat gril tu , tak yah heran...sampai atas sekali pun boleh panjat.Bila dah besar-besar sikit macam kakak tahan la sikit. Yang amat memenatkan bila Deen x de kat umah, outstation.Paling lama masa dia pegi US 3 minggu last year....kalau seminggu tu boleh le survive walaupun penat giler.rasa ghaplah jingga la kata org png, sebab bebudak ni bukan nak dengar cakap aku.Macam nak terkeluar anak tekak tapi diorang cool je, Tapi kalau ngan baba , berdehem pun jadi dah.


so minggu ni aku nak menyiapkan mental aku untuk menghadapi minggu depan. Deen kena pegi Taiwan seminggu, so seminggu le maknanya aku berperang dengan diorang.Sib baik cuti sekolah, tak yah le nak menghantar ke 3 tempat yang berbeza. at least jadi dua tempat je la.



Gambar kat rumah.Since mama tak pakai tudung kena la censored kepala dia...:)



the girls and baba while waiting for the Bee Movie


Makcik-makcik tengah bersembang sambil makan sirih (Alani, 6, Cha , 3, syazwani 1)

Dayang Nur Iman Alani

Selepas setahun lebih, Akhirnya pada 6 mei 2000 lahirlah puteri kami yang Pertama.Picture taken when alani was 2 months.Dengan kepalanya yang berkuping dan tak mau tidur malam, the girl was really a test to my patience as a mum.She was born when i was 25 yrs and 5 months.One fine day, my hubby balik dari kerja just to find out that i was crying sebab she was crying non-stop since morning dan aku dah tatau nak buat apa dah...

The name always drive people crazy.Masa ni aku selalu pegi checkup dia kat government clinic. Nurse-nurse kat sana selalu complain. Dah la nama ayah dia panjang yang pegi bubuh nama dia panjang-panjang buat apa? Diorang sebenarnya mls nak sebut dan tulis.Dayang Nur Iman alani was not the actual name i planned for her.The name which literally means 'Cahaya Ketinggian Iman' was actually the second choice, come to my mind when i was on the labour bed.It was a long labour pain of 18 hrs and i was so exhausted.I keep on whispering to her at that time "Alani keluarlah...mama dah tak larat" The third was proposed by Deen was Dayang Nur Syafiqah, which later taken by my second daughter.The original name i planned for her was Dayang Nurin Miza, which means 'Dua cahaya Yang berseri-seri'. But after a discussion with her maklang (my sister), i changed the name....Nama ni kan macam jodoh pertemuan dan ajal maut juga...ditentukan dari awal sebelum kejadian kita.So it's destined that her name that she will carry forever is Dayang Nur Iman Alani Bt Datu Mohd Rithauddeen (46 chars....:))



this was Alani and her excited baba when she a aged a few days... not even a week yet.



Alani masa kat kubur neneknya ( ibu mertuaku) masa raya tahun 2000



Di zoo Negara 2004



Alani with baba dan mama on her very first trip to Mount kinabalu in 2000. She was 7 months then


Alani tengah excited tengok kek bday dia.This was her 5th bday...sambut kat kampung sebab masa tu tengah pantang kat Syazwani

Bersanding day

This was the most tiring day in my whole life...dengan 2 pasang songket dalam cuaca yang amat panas.... what i can say is i nearly cooked in that costume...luckily lagi dua pasang tu kira okeh la... so...so tak de la panas sangat.

Look at my face... i really looked like telur kan... macam telur yang kita lukis mata hidung mulut tu... aku rasa sebiji cam telur tu... barulah aku tahu memang muka aku macam biji bacang (ore kelate pangge mace) seperti yang pernah dituduh oleh rakan-rakan sebayaku. Mak andam aku masa ni baru belajar mekap orang... so i dont expect much...since she's my own cousin , aku kenalah bagi peluang kat dia...w/pun aku tahu aku akan lebih lawa kalau mak andam pro yang mekap... riak ke nih... sory ye kak na...tapi sekarang stelah 9 tahun dia dah jadi mak andam yang terrer... betul tak?

We are both so skiny at that time ...but watch out now....i've gain +- 10 kg since then , but my hubby is still the champion, he have gained 25 kg...congratulation to him. Well done , Abang...:) his weight at this time was 54 kg with the height is around 177 cm...But what to do , after all those prosperous years...I can say that i'm doing a good job in taking care of him...:)

We got married after less than 3 years of courtship.To my dearest husband... thank you for always stand next to me through thick and thin.Thanks for the patience to all my antics....Most important, thanks for the perseverence to survive the relationship now and then.I will always love You...

this is what i gave to him as an answer to his proposal 11 years ago, selepas tempoh bertenang selama seminggu...hehe...:

Antara Musim

I
ketika musim mengorak warna
Merah mendung berlalu
Melakarkan untaian sepi
Lalu terkubur ketika
Angin salju mencuri masuk
Melalui jendela

Kalimah mengungkapkan erti
Yang pernah tersirat diantara
Pautan hati yang berderai
Mengalirkan darah tanpa warna


Kata Termetri lagi
Antara sangsi dan percaya
Sering rasa pun pecah
Mengundang curiga dan keliru


Bukan tidak mahu
Menoktah kata dan mengikat setia
Dengan Hadirmu
Berulangkali kukatakan
hati sering berdetak
Dengan rentak sumbang
yang memercikkan curiga
kala hatiku kau sapa
debar pun memuncak
menanti kata yang telah kehilangan makna....



II
Diantara susunan puspa
Mekar megolah warna
Mencorakkan batas ilusi
Menggali dan mengambus mimpi
Hati tersinggah disini
Ketika musim semi
Mendinginkan panas mentari
Menghangatkan embun dihujung rumput


Dititik noktah ini
kuberikan padamu
hatiku, hidupku dan jiwaku
Untuk kau lorekkan dengan warna pilihanmu
Yang kupinta hanyalah
Rentetan perjalanan
Menuju sebuah inderaloka impian
Membuahkan cinta


Disini rasa keras telah menepi
Terimalah sekeping hati.....


15/7/1996 (Untuk suamiku, sewaktu hatiku mula kau sapa)

On the Akad Nikah Day

Ini gambar masa akad nikah in early 1999. Adik aku masa ni umurnya 16 tahun...sekang ni dah kawin pun ... baru dalam 4, 5 bulan kawin.


ni pulak gambar dia masa akad nikah bulan 8 2007

Masa ni aku kerja cincai-cincai kat ACSB kat buki jambul penang.Lepas tu lepas kawin merasa jugak jadi suri rumah dekat2 2 tahun sebelum kerja kat tempat kerja sekarang nih... kiranya full time housewife le hingga la si Alani berumur 4 bln kot.... lupa lak...barulah join kompeni sekarang. Kiranya kehidupan menjadi surirumah ni w/pun agak bosan tapi syok pulak bila dikenang...tambah pulak time tak de anak lagi... makan tidur le jawabnya.... tapi masa tu aku ada kucing tau... tompok nama dia... hubby yang bagi nama...dialah peneman aku siang dan malam.... tompok... mana kau sekarang... makcik rindu kat kau...Tompok ni cam merajuk tau... lepas je aku bawak balik Alani lepas pantang , dia pun menghilangkan diri.Dia tak tau aku dah bertekad takkan pilih kasih kat dia walaupun dah ada anak...kalau dia tau musti dia menyesal lari dari rumah.

Princess Syafiqa

Cha or Syafiqa ...abb for Dayang Nur Syafiqah Bt Datu Mohd Rithauddeen was born on 24 october 2003.Kat kampung aku kat kelantan cha means limbah atau longkang yang busuk yang selalunya menjadi tempat takungan lebihan air dari belakang rumah. So it's normal when we were back home in kelantan people said...."Oh my god, you call your kid cha?!..."(dalam loghat kelantan...:) Even my mum also refused to call her that....so they call her pikah , instead, which sounds even worse to me....



Alani was having a good time with the midwife grandaugther at our balcony.Cha was born when we lived in our apartment near USM( now rented to USM PHD student) before we moved to current terrace house( need more space for the kids to grow...:).

She was born on the Deepavali day in Pulau Pinang...weighted 3.2 kg.Among my kids her delivery was the easiest ...Eventhough the labour pain was not so short about 5 hrs but the delivery process when on smoothly with deen rigth by my side. Masa Alani dulu, dia sampai kat kelantan cuma selepas 2 jam Alani lahir.It's quite crazy...as after the waterback burst at 3 am i asked deen to bring me to nasi kandar restaurant , just to eat my favorite roti sardin.sebab kalau dah bersalin tak boleh nak makan benda-benda tu lagi dah.But i cannot really eat as the pain started to intense.At breakfast, pukul 8 macam tu walaupun breakfast sedap tapi dah tak boleh nak makan. Tapi deen paksa aku makan juga dengan menuang 2 biji telur separuh masak dalam mulut aku.... kah...kah...lawak giler bila ingat , sebab masa dia tuang tu dia cakap...makan, makan nanti takde tenaga nak push...so telan je la walaupun nak muntah...She then, was born 2 hours later.I still remember the doctor said, with so good and encouraging husband next to you, you actually dont need a doctor to deliver...hahha...anyway Abang, thanks for that.



Cha and her grandfather (my father in law) when she was 5. At this age she started to be her father's daughter oledi.If i hold her, dia akan hulur tangan dia untuk capai deen, tak mau kena dukung dengan aku, nak dengan deen je...

Her born , in some ways changed me from the inside too. This was the point where i started to appreciate my husband more... his willingness to take care of me during my confinement, alone , here , touched my heart.Plus it was bulan puasa masa tu. So when he prepare his sahur, he would prepare my breaksfast straight away. We hired a midwife to help with the baby and housechores, but only for about 5 days as she's having a family problem.So left him alone to setle everything until we went back to my hometown after 3 weeks.Friends who visited, expressed their surprise to see he handle everything so well, eventhough he just took 3 days leave.

Alone (with my eldest) at home during confinement gave me ample time to think about anything that i normally ignore before.Sometimes people said it's not good to think too much during the confinement as it can depress your mind... boleh meroyan nanti... hehehe... but with the baby that only woke up to be feed at 9, sleep again till 11, woke up for bath and feed than sleep again till 6, what else i can do? But night was different story la... she normally open her eyes widely until 1.00 then wake up again at 2 , 3 ,4,5....The bad thing was i cannot sleep during the day except for a very short nap.

At this time, i started to block myself from dwell too much to the pass, never ever looked back in tears, just look ahead for a better day...and really...since she was born, i excel (in my own way) in many things.I got promoted,setup my own business, write my own book...etc (only my master degree left stuck until now....hehehe... dont worry, i will pick it up someday....someday...:), to my dearest lecturer if you read this...you sure don't think i'm a slow picker ,rite?).

Abang, still remember the letter that i wrote to you after the confinement? I really meant every single word in the content will all my heart...

After she was born, i just noticed that i have a GREAT husband right by my side to support in everything i do...or will do.


This is syafiqa on one of our many2 trips to Cameron Highland (Wonder why Deen likes the place so much). It could be our 15th? 16th? ...hah....I lost count oledi...but definitely more than 15. We'll be there on 2 min visit every year... 2002 was the worst as i still can recall we have more than 5 trips there...one with father in law then with sister, then brother, then brother in law....not included own on private trips (perhaps two). the picture was taken on 26 Nov 2006. She was 3 at this time...cute?...sure, like mother like daughter la... (alamak boleh kena petir nih...)



this picture was taken in 2004 when syafiqa was just 9 months...



Cha bengang sebab Feri lambat sangat. masa jln2 kat langkawi tahun 2006

Sabah

Haha... this was me at my maximum weight (57 kg)! the picture was taken in may 2004.What i can say is ...oh my god... i looked so blotted.As syafiqa was still breastfeeding at that time, diet was never became an agenda. I eat anything i feel like eating and here's the result. Picture location Timpohon Gate, the last gate you can reach by car before you have to continue hike on your foot, Kinabalu mountain. Alani , the cute girl next to me was 4 at this time , while Syafiqa wasjust 5 months...(not in the picture). We took 5 days off from our paid job and visit my inlaws then have a round Sabah trip. With Deen's sister Waja we travelled from KK up to tambunan, kelupis, sandakan, semporna,Lahad Datu (My father in law hometown) end up at Tawau. The journey was superb. Best giler espcially banyak benda2 yg unik sepanjang perjalanan.... too tired to story aaa... but it's worth of trying...:)


this was at one of the roadside stop , somewhere near Kundasang.



This photo taken at Pasar ikan masin Semporna , for those ikan masin lovers, this will be the heaven for you.Tapi aku bukan tengah pilih ikan masin tau... ikan masin ada kat background belakang nun...

Hubby's company dinner at Bayview beach

17 Nov 07
This year rasanya dah 4th time aku ikut Deen pergi dinner company dia. except for 1 time masa syafiqa kecik, kiranya x pernah miss le aku pegi semenjak dia join company ni. Every year, food, biasa la sama je... 4 season le apa lagi... but he likes it.Nyaris x jadi pegi tadi sebab tak de sapa nak babysit the girls...memula tu babysitter syazwani commited dah tapi tiba-tiba plak dia ada hal. Kami pulak kalut sebab majlis raye Alani's nursery (she's a 'transit' there now, since she start schooling januari taun ni) bermula pukul 3.00. Deen was asked be to be the cameraman, maksudnya kami memang kena stay throughout the ceremony la...dah pukul 5 baru abis dengan nak sembahyang asar lagi.




Then Deen mintak ayah kawan dia jaga tapi aku kesian tengok pakcik tu sebab ...hahaha... the girls sure torture his life nyer. At the then terpaksa gak tinggal dalam sejam sebelum pakcik diorang balik dari town dan mengambik diorang dari rumah kawan Deen tu....berjaya jugak kami pergi dinner tahun ni walaupun bersusah payah.